TOP 10 DUMB AND DUMBER CRIMINALS

We’re not talking Lloyd and Harry dumbos here. We’re straight up listing real dummies who commit crimes, or try to. Counting down from ten to one - away we go! 

10. RYAN LOCHTE, USA OLYMPIAN

Vandalized a bathroom in Brazil? And then you got on a plane ditching your homies? Yeah you’re an Olympian, bro, who just won the gold for bonehead move.

https://ryanlochte.com/

9. ALDON SMITH, NFL PLAYER

News article read: “Yeah, my car just came to an abrupt stop”….In a tree, bro! Somehow you left that part out.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.sportingnews.com/us/amp/nfl/news/aldon-smith-timeline-trouble-arrested-suspensions-history/rg7ss2w4qx5i1boyj36tycphx

8. WINONA RYDER, 5 FINGER DISCOUNT

You are rich as F and you shoplifted from a department store. Like NOBODY would know who you are, go ahead and take the lip gloss. 

https://m.imdb.com/name/nm0000213/

7. WORRIED METH USER, CHASTITY HOPSON

What do you do when you read that your meth could be tainted with Ebola? You call the police to help check your supply of course!

https://m.mysanantonio.com/news/local/crime/article/Central-Texas-woman-arrested-after-police-share-7212671.php

6. FACE-BOOKED, LEVI CHARLES REARDOON

When you see a post on Facebook catch your eye, you hit the “like” button. That’s all Levi did when he saw his own wanted photo on local police feed. Nailed it.

https://www.google.com/amp/www.nydailynews.com/amp/news/national/montana-man-arrested-liking-wanted-poster-article-1.2203810

5. CHRISTOPHER BRIGGS, WHITE HOUSE VISITOR

Name sir? Christopher. Reason for visit? Oh, just gonna shoot a couple rounds. Is that what the bag of ammo is for? Sure is.

https://www.adl.org/blog/christopher-wade-briggs-would-be-gunman-posts-picture-of-self-in-front-of-white-house

4. FACEBOOK FAIL, MACK YEARWOOD

Everyone likes updating their profile pic when they snap a goody. That’s all Mack wanted to do when he used his own Wanted Poster for his new update.

http://abcnews.go.com/US/florida-suspect-wanted-poster-facebook-profile-picture/story?id=41822973

3. SAMANTHA HENSON, SHOP WITH A COP

All Sam wanted was her son to get some legit stuff while participating in the “shop with a cop” program. That and a few “free” items for herself too- the cop won’t care right? 

https://www.reuters.com/article/us-usa-kentucky-shoplifting/kentucky-woman-arrested-for-shoplifting-at-a-shop-with-a-cop-event-idUSKBN0JV2UC20141217

2. Shawn Michael Robinson, Real cop/fake cop

In Dumfries (seriously) a routine police stop went down. Only thing was Shawn was impersonating a cop when he pulled over a real cop. Well, this just got awkward.

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/nation-now/2015/01/30/fake-cop-pulls-over-real-cop/22605785/

 1. TRES AMIGOS, AKA DONKEY STEALERS

When your getaway car is a literal donkey and it starts “hee-hawing” while on a heist so loud the cops are called- it’s time to redo some life choices guys.

https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/southamerica/colombia/9815243/Getaway-donkey-ruins-robbery.html

HONORABLE MENTION:

“Lady” in...a beard?

Dennis had the perfect costume when he robbed a bank. Wig? Check. Fake breasts? Check. 5 o’clock shadow? Check. Wait….

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/man-dressed-in-wig-clown-pants-and-fake-breasts-robs-bank-with-bb-gun-say-cops/?ftag=CNM-00-10aab4i

And there you have your 10 dumbest criminals who have given us more than they got for their idiot moves. Thanks for the laughs though.